An "I'm a mom of a one month old" brain dump...
* I cannot even believe one month has passed already. It has been the most difficult, yet most rewarding, month of my entire life.
* They aren't kidding when they say nothing compares to a mother's love. I love every single thing about Bimmer. From the way her hair curls out around her ears to her little fat rolls around her ankles. From her "sucky face" she makes when she's hungry (which precedes the bloody-murder-feed-me-now-or-I-will-cut-a-bitch wail) to the open-mouthed face plants she lands on my cheek when I am burping her. (They're the closest thing to baby kisses I get!) Even her imperfections are perfect to me.
* My husband really is sexier than ever when he's taking care of Bimmer. When he kisses her, changes her, and calls her his "little angel," my heart just melts. I fall in love with him over and over again.
* I am hopeful that we will be getting to the point here soon where she will sleep for longer than 3 hours at a time. Until then, I will gaze lovingly into her eyes as I feed her by the glow of her night light as she graps her hand around my pinkie. But I won't talk to her. Because I don't have much nice to say at 2:30am.
* Sometimes I swaddle her when she's really mad. It's not to calm her down. It's really just a distraction since she hates it so much. It keeps her occupied and quiet for a few minutes while she plots her escape and wiggles her arms free. It usually gives me enough time to eat a bowl of cereal for breakfast.
* Puff and I have a lot on the agenda for July. By the time I am posting my two month brain dump, our little one will have been to more states than some adults. She will have met her grandma and both great-grandmothers too. The joy this little bundle has brought all of them, without them having met her yet, is amazing. I figure there may be some tears of happiness in the coming weeks. Please don't rob us while we're out of town. I promise everything in the house is covered in dried formula and baby poop.
* I am not so silently panicking about not having a babysitter, since there are going to be appointments coming up that are not baby-friendly. Any takers? LOL! A big shout out to all those friends and family members who have dropped everything to visit us thus far and for all your gifts, love, and support. Even if you're not nearby, those Facebook messages and cards you send have brightened many days. We are lucky to have you in our lives!
* Am I a bad mom since I have yet to change the sheets in Bimmer's crib? In my defense, she has yet to spit up or go to the bathroom on them. So technically they're still clean, right?
* Lastly, I have to share the moment of clarity I had where I realized I was the mother of a newborn. No, it wasn't because of lack or sleep or because I didn't have time to shower. No... it happened when she was about 3 weeks old and was screaming her head off at 4am for a bottle. I was starving and had to pee. So, I found myself sitting on the toilet eating a graham cracker. And I somehow managed to get crumbs in my panties. That? Well, that was the moment I realized my life is not my own anymore. My life belongs to Bimmer.
Happy one month of life, little princess. Mommy and Daddy love you!