Wednesday, June 29, 2011

To Be Fair, I Hate People Too

I'm 99% sure I don't like your dog. Especially if I've never met it before. I'm just not a dog person. And contrary to some's beliefs, that does not make me anti-American or anti-animals or a member of Al Qaeda. It simply means I would rather you keep your dog away from me. I flat out cannot handle them. Especially inside ones. The thought simply makes me cringe.

At my last job, we had a big-wig from the corporate office come to town. I will never forget when he went to get into my boss's car to be taken to his hotel and he immediately shut the door back and refused to get inside. The reason? There was dog hair all over the seats. A symptom of dog-fever that people whom have caught this bug seem to overlook. I ended up having to drive him across town, since my car was nice and hair free.

I thought it was funny at the time, but the older I get, the more I'm jumping on his bandwagon. Who would willingly want to be covered in dog hair day after day? Not to mention all the other horrible things about them. They bark. They whine. They pant. They puke behind the couch and you don't find it for a few days. They poop on your oriental rug and you could almost step in it in your bare feet. They smell. And they smell worse after you've washed them. Oh yeah, and their food smells pretty gnarly too. Not to mention they have ZERO manners when it comes to chomping on their food and lapping up their water. The sound of a dog drinking is enough to push my OCD with noises into hyper-drive and send me into unchartered panic attack territory.

Dating The Ex and his crazy family didn't help any. The memory of their giant German Shepard rubbing against my leg at the dinner table sends chills down my spine. Then when he would drink from the bowl they conveniently had placed right next to the kitchen table... I'm about to gag right now! I just know I ingested some hair in my food over the years we were dating. There were times the dog would fart while laying under the table and start to lick my feet and I would literally have to excuse myself for a minute so I didn't vomit all over my plate. I made it a point after the first year to eat there as infrequently as possible.

So, here's the deal. I don't hate ALL dogs, but I'm not ready to be chummy with any of them either. If you keep your house clean and your furniture relatively hair free, I'll be fine. However, if you invite me for dinner and the dog is in the kitchen while you're preparing the meal or next to me as I'm expected to eat, then all bets are off. If you cannot make that accommodation to me, as a guest in your house, then don't be offended when I will not eat what you have cooked. We're probably just better off going to a restaurant. And no, I'm not going to be intentionally mean to your dog. I won't kick it. (Unless it deserves it! Ha!) But really... if it rubs against me, I will shy away. If it licks me, I will cringe. If it dares to jump on me, I will forcefully push it away and yell "NO!" because you obviously have not spent enough time in Puppy Kindergarten. I do not want to pet it. I do not want to tell you how cute it is. And in the back of my mind, I will also be silently criticizing the stupid name you gave it.

It's all a bit like the military's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. If you don't ask me to like your dog, then I won't tell you to your face how much I dislike it. Although, you totally will have that gut feeling that you know my secret. I'm not very good at hiding it. The reality is that I don't have to hide it. It's how I am and take it or leave it. It's gag-worthy enough when some of my own hair ends up in my mouth during sex. And I know where that hair has been.

And it has not been licking my balls.

P.S. Don't despair, Dog Lovers, I'm all for equality. I hate cats too. Probably more than dogs. In fact, definitely more than dogs. Being slightly allergic to them doesn't help their cause.

Monday, June 27, 2011

Travelogue: Part 4

Time to recap our most favoritest trip day ever! Eh... maybe not EVER, but definitely the best on this adventure.

As I think I mentioned once (or twelve times)  before, Estonia was the place we had the highest hopes for and the little country did not let us down! Medieval Tallinn was magnificent and we would fly back tomorrow if we could!



This tower, Fat Margaret, was the first glimpse of the ancient walled city as we approached from the port. It lead to a gorgeous stone arch over cobblestoned Pikk Street, which rambled past old colorful buildings. We were out early, so we were able to take our time without battling for space with the tour groups. It felt a bit like Charleston, SC, with that sort of charm, mixed with a decidedly European vibe.




Pikk Street wound past charming churches (see Here) and opened up in grand style to the Town Hall Square. It was lined with umbrella-strewn restaurants and cafes, while the 15th-century town hall itself loomed overhead. The town was preparing for a festival, which we stumbled back upon later that day. We shared pizza while listening to Estonian children sing religious songs, followed by a parade of women in traditional folk costumes. It was one of those travel moments you live for!



At the top of a steep (like, crazy ass steep) stone ramp, you emerge into a courtyard in the Upper Town. The ramparts of the city wall tower overhead and when you come out from underneath them, you see this Russian Orthodox church. Since it was Sunday, there was prayer going on, but we were able to stand in the back and listen to the priest (preacher?) although we didn't understand a word. The widows on the front steps, shawls over their head, begging for change seemed to be one of those honest worldly moments you don't stumble across every day.



A few blocks up other streets, behind another church, around the bend, and under an arch (did you follow all that?) was THIS view. And THIS is why you fall in love with Tallinn. Among other things, like the fantastic people, cute stores, charming buildings. But this view. ::sigh:: Had those tour groups not come up behind us and run us off, I could've sat there all day. The bright side of being run off was that we ducked into a cute little store and bought a set of nativity ornaments that were handcarved and handpainted. Such a great souvenir!



The town was over-run with adorable back lanes and stone buildings. This was a side street Rick Steves had mentioned in his walking tour of the town. (We printed a copy from his website and did the tour on our own. Got some history without being stuck in a group!) I believe it was called Catherine's Passage and it had arts & crafts stores on one side and old tombstone ruins lining the wall on the other side. We also meandered well off the well-worn travel path and snuck outside the city walls to stumble across another small, local, festival and to wander through an art installation.

We left Estonia with a bit of a heavy heart. It's definitely one of my favorite places I've ever been and definitely tops on my list of places with Puff. (Although our 9 day Ireland adventure was pretty rock star!) We would love to head back here someday and also explore nearby Riga, Latvia, since it looks just about as cool as Tallinn.

Gotta have a dream list, right?

Friday, June 24, 2011

Flash Bulb Friday


::sigh::
 
Estonia.
 
How we love thee! Puff and I had high expectations for the medieval town of Tallinn, Estonia, and we were not disappointed. Everything from the cobblestone streets to the old city wall... it was eye candy for the traveler's soul!
 
This cool clock was on the side of the Church of the Holy Ghost and reportedly is from 1633. The church is a 14th century design. I'm not 100% sure the history of the area, but it definitely was seemingly spared any major damage during the war. And perhaps being locked away behind the Iron Curtain for so long helped it freeze in time even more. But definite props go to the townspeople for restoring it to this glory!
 
Puff and I aren't sure if the rest of Estonia is this amazing, but we definitely would consider a trip back there in our future. Perhaps we could bundle it with Latvia and Lithuania as well! (Just watched a show about Riga, Latvia, and it looks just as cool... only full of Art Nouveau buildings!) Never hurts to dream, right?
 
We lucked out that Estonia was full of dreaming possibilities!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Travelogue: Part 3

Ready for another rub-it-in-your-face Europe recap? I'm not intentionally rubbing it in anyone's face, but someone mentioned to me recently that blabbering about my travels makes them feel like their vacations all suck. Not my intention, people! Chill out! And if you need a cool vacation destination suggestion, just ask! Puff and I have a pocket full of ones we haven't even done yet! (Slovenia anyone?)
 
So... our next big stop was the port of Warnemunde in Germany. It's about 3 hours by train from Berlin, but we didn't want to feel too rushed, so my German-speaking husband booked us train tickets to a small town called Schwerin, about an hour and a half from port. It was out own little German adventure!
 

Puff got on my case for stopping to take a picture of the train station. I'm pretty sure he thought I was documenting the McDonalds. Sometimes, I just go all Japanese tourist and he can't handle it. Since I refrained from photos on the train, I figured this would do. Although not taking on-the-train pics was probably wise since that creepy goth kid kept staring at me the whole way. He probably just thought I was super hot. Why wouldn't he?
 


It only seemed right that Puff and I stumble upon a festival in a random town in Germany, since we frequent so many around home. A band literally announced our arrival into town, since we came up from behind them and were obviously the only day-tripping tourists at that point. I kept referring to it as the "Safety Parade" although calling it a parade was ridiculous since there was no parading happening. It was a nice place to get an ID tag for your kid or perhaps learn how to properly buckle your safety belt. All on a Friday morning? Do people in Germany not have jobs?


Reading online about Schwerin made it sound very cute and quaint. And it was definitely that. Sure, we eventually ran into some tourists, but in general, it felt very real. The town square was bare when we got there that morning, save for a few locals riding their bikes... possibly to jobs? We popped in the cathedral and then wandered down some back lanes toward the palace.



The Schwerin Palace was the "it" thing to see and do in this town. It was really pretty, actually. And was finishing a massive renovation. The inside rooms were typical European palacey but the grounds were beautifully situated on a lake and there were groves of orange trees. Or at least I think that's what they were. Regardless, it was also the "it" place to have wedding photos done. Several couples were there that day. Our favorite was the lady with the roughed up hair who was wearing a dress that hit her knees in the front, but her ankles in the back. I'm so surprised I missed that option at David's Bridal for my own wedding last year. Darn!
 
After palace touring and random building photo taking, we ventured down a cobbled alleyway to a small restaurant in a tudor building. Puff nursed a giant beer and I ate fresh produce, during the height of a massive E. Coli breakout. It was all worth it. Puff impressed me with his mad German-speaking skills and we got to escape cruise tours and most of the Japanese tourists. And that is always a victory.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

A Panty Problem

If Puff ever says he can get by without me in life, I'm going to immediately remind him of this story...
 
Last week, he set off for a few days in Charleston for a business trip. I let him pack on his own, which, you will some come to find out, was a bad idea. He makes fun of my anal retentive packing lists, but they're in place for a reason! So... Tuesday night, as he was getting settled into his hotel room, Puff gave me a ring. In the midst of his unpacking during our conversation, he came to a frightening realization; he had not packed any clean boxers.
 
His first meeting the next morning was at 9am. It was after 9pm when he realized this, and with his hotel in the historic part of downtown, there wasn't exactly a 24-hour Walmart in close proximity. My immediate reaction to this news was to laugh. Of course! Because had I packed, I certainly would've remembered clean panties! He was battling with what to do about the situation. He wanted to know if I thought washing them out in the sink with shampoo would work. I talked him out of it, because even with some blow drying, I was afraid they'd still be too wet to wear in the morning. And going commando or with damp-panty-ass wouldn't be good on your first day of training for your new job!
 
The next morning, I got a text around 8am that he was en route to a Target to buy some new boxers. For some reason, I envisioned him trying to change into them in the store parking lot. Now, Puff's not an idiot, but on occasion, he makes faulty decisions that make no logical sense. I just feared his junk would suddenly be on display in the front seat of his rental car, when some soccer mom pulled up next to him in her mini-van. That junk is all mine, people. 
 
Thankfully, he opted to change in the Target bathroom instead. But then he followed it up with one of those faulty-logic decisions... he put the Target bag (which we all know is partially see-thru) on the back seat of his car... dirty man panties included. Now, why it didn't occur to him to put the bag in the trunk just blows my mind. Do you not realize that people walk through parking lots at their office and could potentially SEE this bag and its contents? ::sigh::
 
Well, what happens next? His training group decides to make a run for lunch. And he drives. With 3 other people in his car. Meaning... 2 grown men get into the back seat of the rental car and his dirty underwear are laying on the seat. Apparently, he tried to jump in front of them to grab the bag to put it in the trunk, but they said it was fine. REALLY?!?! I about died of embarrassment from just being associated with the man who left his dirty undies on the car seat, in plain view, while his new co-workers rode along in the seat next to them!
Then Wednesday night happens. (Didn't think this could possibly get any more embarrassing, did you?) He's walking back to his hotel after dinner and we're on the phone. He's telling me the story about the car fiasco and a light goes off in his head... he had forgotten the bag, which also contained clean boxers for the next day, in the car. And it was in valet parking. We decided he would need to ask them to either 1) bring the car up for him to get the bag out or B) tell him where the car was, give him the keys, and let him walk to go get it.
 
Yet, somehow, we ended up at option #3... have the valet guy go to the car and get the bag for Puff. Yes, you read that correctly. My husband sent a college-aged valet boy to his car to fetch his bag of underwear. I wasn't even there, nor would this kid know me from Adam, but I died a little inside. I wanted to cower up into the couch and bury my head in shame.
 
I hope Puff learned a lesson in all of this. Maybe he shouldn't tell his wife she's nagging him when she checks and double-checks that things are all in place and ready to go for a trip. I'll be sure he doesn't live this one down for quite a long time!

Monday, June 20, 2011

Travelogue: Part 2

Time for another travel update from our European Adventure! The second day we were in Denmark, the first order of business was to haul our butts to Nyhavn as early as possible to jump on a canal cruise.
 
 
The city symbol of Copenhagen is none other than a statue of Hans Christian Anderson's Little Mermaid. However, with some extensive research on her location, etc, we decided that walking and/or taxiing out to visit her would be a waste. So, I ensured that our canal cruise would take us right past her. She was definitely underwhelming. But I saw her, so check that one off my life list!
 
 
I have no idea what this building is, or what it had been, but I liked it. A lot. It wasn't until I got home to edit this picture, however, that I realized it's not exactly straight. I suppose that's what happens when you're taking pictures from a moving boat. Oh well... it's decidedly European to me and I still like it. I'm a little wonky sometimes, so why can't my photos be as well?
 
 
The canal cruise wove us through an area of town called Christianhavn. My impression going in was that it was a bit of a hippie refuge. While we never saw anything decidedly free-spirited there, we did see lots of cute house boats, restaurants on the water, and such. (I'll have one in Flash Bulb coming up!) It was a part of town where I could see myself. Lots of cute apartments overlooking the canals, with cafes and bakeries below.
 
 
I mentioned Nyhavn earlier, but it's pretty much the cutest part of Copenhagen. It was originally a red light district, but has now morphed into a touristy area with cafes and shops. You can't blame the tourists for flocking here... it really is crazy picturesque. I had a hard time resisting taking photo after photo of all the gorgeously adorable colored buildings.
 
 
Since we took the canal cruise so early, and our ship didn't board until mid-afternoon, Puff found a castle, Rosenborg, and the King's Courtyard, which was a garden/park area to explore. Only about a 5-10 minute walk from Nyhavn, we found ourselves on a park bench, surrounded by kids on a school trip, throwing frisbee and kicking around a soccer ball.
 
That afternoon, following some shopping along the Stroget, we made our way to our ship, the Norwegian Sun. I will throw out a disclaimer that Puff and I were decidely unhappy with Norwegian, and would be hard pressed to sail them again. While our itinerary rocked this world, our ship and its service and crappy food, did not. Thankfully, we did not let that deter us from having a blast! Onward we went to Germany!

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Sleepy Time? I wish!

My grandmother has insomnia. She's lucky if she can catch 4 hours a night, and it's always in spurts.

I have a dreaded feeling in the pit of my stomach, that is my future.

Mostly in the past 3 or 4 years, I've noticed I have nights when no matter how tired I am, I just cannot fall asleep. Tonight, is one of those nights. I've tried watching a boring TV show for an hour and just turning out the lights for an hour to lay in darkness.

Nothing. I can't turn off my brain!

Any suggestions for tuning out your thoughts and being able to get out of your head? I'm so reluctant to start using any type of medication.

Wait... does rum count as medicine?

Friday, June 17, 2011

Flash Bulb Friday


I realized when we got back from Europe, after ogling over this photo and totally loving it, that I have a thing for taking pictures of things off-center. (Case in point... Here and Here and Here and Here. I could go on forever apparently!) There's just something about it that catches my eye. So, with that being said, enjoy this newly off-center photo!
 
The background story? Right... so this was taken in Schwerin, Germany. I'm sure I'll get to the actual trip update for that adventure soon. This was a statue at the Schwerin Palace, on their beautiful, lovely, grounds overlooking a lake. Don't let the gorgeous blue sky fool you... it was chilly and windy that day!
 
But regardless of the weather... don't palaces just exude something romantic and wonderful? Even when naked statue-boobies are involved? Yeah... I think so!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Channeling the Pioneers

Last night, the weather gods conspired with the power nymphs and took away my electricity for a staggering 2 1/2 hours. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to entertain a grown woman with ADD for that long? Oh yeah... did I fail to mention that Puff is in Charleston on business, so I was home ALONE????
 
My original plan for the evening, to keep me entertained, was to upload trip photos, update my Ipod, iron next week's clothes, and catch up on "16 and Pregnant." But then 6:40pm hit and all hell broke loose. As in, my lights flickered, but came back on. But then they went out for good. Although my ceiling fan light in the spare room kept flickering even as the other lights were totally out and I could've sworn they were about to spark. The last thing I needed was a house fire. Although, I suppose it would've kept me busy and out of trouble.
 
Texts to Mike, Kimhead, and Puff kept me busy for a short while. Eventually, I found myself laying on the bed, watching the storm, wearing as few clothes as possible (ya know... since the power was out and therefore, no AC) and literally twiddling my thumbs. I lit a candle but didn't need it for anything. Why? Because I had no magazines. No newspaper. No books I hadn't already read. No word find or crossword puzzles. I was about to bust out "Life" and see if I could successfully play myself in a board game.
 
A moment of brilliance struck me when I realized the elliptical was battery operated, so I worked out by candle light. I realized it wasn't the wisest move in the world when I was soaked in sweat and there was no way to cool off. The wind was blowing the rain so hard, I couldn't open the windows to let in some breeze. I went back to laying alone and helpless and pitiful in the bed. Another moment of brilliance struck when I realized the laundry room was bright enough from the outside light to do... well, something? I reorganized our grocery list and rewrote it in aisle order. Twice. Thank you, ADD and OCD for co-sponsoring this moment.
 
I'm pretty sure, right about then, is when I started creating the "I love electricity" song and dance number. The choreography was rock star.
 
A 30 minute phone call to Kimhead to catch up on life was a good time-waster. (Not that talking to her was a waste. You know what I mean!) Finally, I threw on a bra and some shoes and ducked out in the heavy sprinkle to drive around the neighborhood. At least there was air conditioning in the car. I figured out where the power came back on in either direction from our street. And popped into a Walgreens to buy a much-needed magazine. I had no idea how much longer I'd be without power and it was way too early to go to bed!
 
By the time I got home, the rain had fizzled away for the most part, although then the house started to creak. I'm not good with being home alone anyway, so the lack of ability to create ambient noise was blowing my mind. I jumped out of bed every time I heard something out of the ordinary. Eventually, I settled in with my trashy gossip magazine, leaning awkwardly out of the bed to have the candlelight hit it just enough to actually be able to read it. About halfway through, I heard a crazy weird noise. Of course, I jumped up. But oh, what a good noise it turned out to be!
 
Earlier, when the ceiling light threatened fire, I had gone around and turned off all the lightswitches that had been on. So when the power came back on, I would not have even known had my printer not gone haywire and tried to reset itself. That was the crazy weird noise! I'm pretty sure the happiness that overcame me in that moment was palatable to our neighbors.
 
Candles blown out, TV back on, phone call from Puff... I rounded out the evening in grand style... with every light on in the house! It did teach me a few things... Like I need to create a stockpile of magazines or books for such occasions. And it showed me that I can survive without power. I just might not come out with any sanity on the other end.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Regular Homebody

Being gone for two weeks means a lot of things can freely fall to the wayside. No work. No bills. No laundry. No cutting grass. Although, when you return, magically, all those things are still there. And they've piled up. All those bills are now due at once. There's laundry overflowing from baskets and suitcases. And don't even get me started on the yard. We're officially THAT house in the neighborhood.
 
Yet, I've found myself almost relishing in the domestic life since we've gotten home. I didn't mind dusting the house... or rather, watching Puff dust the house. I didn't mind dishes or laundry. I even folded it and put it away in record time! I've been OK with plopping down on the couch after work instead of exercising or running errands or entertaining Puff. Writing new blogs isn't a chore and uploading and editing photos has been a welcome distraction.
 
Contentment comes to mind. I'm completely, 100% content in my life. I suppose it took being away from our cute little house and our ho-hum daily lives to realize that all those chores aren't that bad after all. Although, most people would pounce all over that last statement and say that our lives are anything but ho-hum. Yes, they're probably right. But right now, we're relishing that ho-hum style for awhile. And soon, our house will be back in order and our yard will be beautified (updates coming soon on our flower planting expedition) and we can start worrying about our next adventure.
 
Because, really, I'm already ready for another vacation!

Monday, June 13, 2011

Travelogue: Part 1

I suppose after knowing I just spent two weeks abroad, you're probably looking for some sort of travel updates? Well, I suppose it's about time to give you some! The plan is to post one entry per day in each major city, so 8 in total, and I'll include a few random photos to help make the story easier to enjoy. We'll start where we started... Copenhagen, Denmark.
 
My favorite part of the flight over was that I was wearing a Styx t-shirt. Puff kept making fun of me and I kept insisting that people in Denmark like Styx. He wasn't so sure. After hours of him picking on me, it finally settled down as we made our final approach to land. We had all but forgotten about it. Until I walked off the plane. There was a Danish guy, working for the airport, on the gangway.
 
"Styx!!!" I heard someone yell from behind me. I turned around to see him. He flashed a major smile and gave me a thumbs up. "They're a really good band!"
 
See, Puff. I told you they like Styx in Denmark. Boo yah.
 
 
I'm pretty sure pastries are the reason people go to Denmark. If it's not, it totally should be. We stumbled across a bakery whose window was so full of goodies, I thought my head might explode. Don't worry... we managed to squeeze in another stop there before we left town.
 
 
In our sleep-deprived wanderings, we stumbled through a back courtyard between the library and a castle and found this adorable little red house. This is why veering off the well-traveled tourist path is always a good idea.
 
 
Old cities with old castles and palaces are always fun. While we couldn't go inside, or didn't even try, Christianborg Slot was a beauty. With the skies threatening rain, we didn't hang around long, but snuggled up against each other under some trees for a second before snapping some photos and moving right along.
 
 
 
Nothing screams Copenhagen to me more than Tivoli Gardens. It's one of the oldest amusement parks in the world and was full of fun things like pantomime theaters and Indian-inspired buildings. Puff and I watched children ride hot air balloon inspired ferris wheels and relaxed in lounge chairs on a green field in front of an amphitheater. The calm of such a fun, nostalgic, place was extraordinary.
 
We topped the day off with a pizza in a greenhouse at Tivoli and a 3 hour nap in our hotel room. Dinner was meat-on-a-stick from a street vendor on a bench in the end-of-the-day-bare town hall square. We curled up in bed with Maltesers (my favorite candy when I'm in Europe) and Coke and watched a TV show about head lice.
 
We're nothing if not exciting and enviable.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Flash Bulb Friday


For the foreseeable future, my Flash Bulb Friday entries will be pictures from my fabulously wonderful trip to Scandinavia with my dear husband. I'm sure you won't mind.
 
Today's picture was from our second full day in Europe, in the area of Nyhavn, in Copenhagen, Denmark. We started the day early and walked the lonely streets from our hotel to this tourist area. There was a slight nip in the air, but it was nothing a stop at a bakery to gorge ourselves on pastries didn't fix. An early morning canal cruise, complete with an adorable pre-school group who screamed whenever we went under a bridge, dropped us back in Nyhavn. The sun was just high enough to be illuminating the colorful buildings, yet it was still early enough that the stores and cafes weren't open, so it was quiet and tranquil.
 
There's something to be said about being up early and taking in someplace without hoardes of tourists. It's one of my favorite things about my marriage to Puff... we're both early risers, and we've been able to capture some beautiful, peaceful, moments alone in the busiest of places. Copenhagen included.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Remember to Stay Hydrated Too

Before Puff and I jetted off to Europe, I had a very spirited conversation with one of my single girlfriends. She shall remain nameless, so as to not force any embarrassment on her. Although if I were her, I wouldn't be embarrassed, but rather, damn proud of myself. Ha!
 
So... she's got this new man in her life and they just had their first real date. Apparently it was a GOOD date, since they ended up back at her place to snuggle up on the couch. Well, we all know that grown adults don't usually end a good date with snuggling, so commence the make out session!
 
As she's telling me this story, I'm internally rooting for her. I'm hoping for that next step. We all wish our girlfriends good lovin', right? Well, her story took a sharp left turn and I'm pretty sure I literally fell off the bed in a fit of hysterical laughter when she told me this... that when they stood up off the couch her body hurt and popped. I can't remember what hurt... her back or thighs or what. OK, so I know it was her thighs at some point because I remember having a wink-wink-nudge-nudge moment when that was spilled.  
 
Between the tears, I got to thinking... are make out sessions after age 30 dangerous? Muscles don't work like they used to and I'm certain we're not as limber as we were 10 years ago. And don't even think about sitting in an awkward position or laying on a hard surface. The body just can't handle it anymore!
 
The mental image of my dear friend, standing in her living room, arched with her hands in the small of her back, rocking her neck from side to side, just makes me giggle. Maybe she'll learn her lesson. Next time, she better stretch first!

Monday, June 6, 2011

I Love, Love

In digging through archives, I found this post I had written back in 2005. It made me nostalgic and made me love my marriage, all at the same time.

A list of things that are wonderful about being in a relationship...

At the beginning, I love the feeling you get when you like someone. The constant butterflies in the stomach, the anxiousness awaiting their phone call, and the hope that perhaps this time he's "the one." Constantly refreshing your email inbox to see if anything new was sent. Dropping whatever you're doing when you hear the "ding" that you have a new IM and hoping that it's that person. Then you get to long phone conversations, even if they're just across town or across the country. Late at night, going on for hours, talking about absolutely nothing in particular. Just enjoying hearing their voice and feeling that closeness. Then checking your phone for messages or text messages whenever you've been away from it for more than a minute.

I enjoy coming home and having someone there to greet me, or having them come home to me and me being there to greet them. Having someone to talk to and vent about our horrible or great day. Cooking dinner together in the kitchen, even though I can't cook. Deciding who gets to clean what dishes, arguing later of who gets to do the vacuuming and who has to clean the bathroom. Leaving "Honey-Do" lists for him to do everything anyway. Going to the grocery store together. (That's my favorite. I'm weird, I know.) Running mundane errands together. Holding hands.

Smiling and nodding when I talk about baby names and agreeing to name them pretty much whatever I want, even though I do know when the time finally comes, he'll want more say than that. Smiling and nodding when I banter on and on (and on and on and on) about places I want to travel to. And pretending to listen when I say I'm going here in this year and then to here. Having it all planned out and just going with it, like it's nothing. Never allowing me to know if he's really excited about it or not. But dammit, any man I am ever with better fucking be excited about travel!!!

Curling up on the couch together to watch television. Falling asleep with my head on his shoulder, curled up against him. Knowing there's no place I'd rather be, no place safer, in the whole entire world. Coming home to a surprise. Having a love note left on your windshield when you don't expect it. Getting a letter in the mail from them when you don't expect it. Getting flowers for absolutely no reason.

Whispering something sweet in my ear at the movies and me not minding because even though I hate whispering, it's OK that one time. Watching sporting events with me and not getting embarassed by how loudly I scream at the television. Especially during Kings and Cowboys games. And me secretly hoping that they're smiling at me and love that part of me. Being out and seeing each other across the room, both of us talking to different people, and still being able to see the sparkle in their eye that they are only interested in you, no matter how many other people you talk to.

Having secrets that only the two of you know. Being able to say one word or name or phrase and instantly start laughing because you know what the meaning is behind it. Reminissing about the early days in a relationship when things were so different than they are months later, but being able to do so with a smile. Having someone there for me when I'm sick. But if they're not there, be able to put on one of their big t-shirts and lay around in it and be comforted by the fact that it's some part of them there with you. Posing and smiling for endless amounts of photos, that I DO go back and look through all of the time.

Meeting his parents for the first time and being so nervous. Them meeting mine and being even more so. My dad sizing him up and determining if he's good enough for me or not. The four of us going out to dinner and to concerts or traveling together. Me trying to be polite that I don't care for other people's cooking without coming off as a total bitch. And me never thinking that their mom totally approves of me. Always thinking that she wishes he was with his closest female friend or an ex from way back when, instead of with me.

The first kiss. The anticipation leading up to it. Again, the butterflies. Already he's holding you in his arms, saying something either sweet or witty. You can see it in his eyes that he wants to, but the good ones always hesitate. I love that hesitation. Gives me a chance to see that they're human. The first "I love you." Sometimes coming as a shock, sometimes coming later or earlier than expected. Usually always followed as soon as possible by a jumping up and down session with the first friend you can find. The first time you make love. It's not just sex, because he's concerned about not only himself, but you too.

Having them there to listen to you when you need to talk. Just talk about anything. Or nothing. Have them hold you when something's upsetting you. Have them kiss you on the forehead... I love forehead kisses more than any other kind... and wipe away the tears. Be able to ramble on and on in emails or journals and have them take away something from it. But not being afraid to express your true feelings because you know they've already judged you and like what they see.

Not having to constantly impress them, but somehow managing to do so anyway.

And then one day, he tells you he’ll love you until he’s taken his last breath. And the world will just…

Stop.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

We Survived

Puff and I have successfully made it back from two weeks in the Baltic. Stay tuned in the coming week for many updates and stories about our travels!

The scenario that best sums up how we feel after being sick on Friday and then being awake for 24 hours of travel? Earlier today, I managed to drag myself out of  bed and undress en route to a much-needed shower. Puff saw me and said:

"Honey, you don't have any pants on. But you're so dirty, it's not even sexy."

P.S. Big shout out to Kimhead for posting a few updates while I was gone. One of them didn't post correctly, so I'll repost it later this week for you!