Monday, July 1, 2013

Turning Green

In general, I try super hard to not be a jealous person. I do sometimes have to remind myself of how lucky I am and how blessed my life is. I have my moments. But it seems like I've been having more lately than usual, and I'm not sure why. Yet, I've realized that sometimes I hear things that aren't really said. I distort the reality of the situation in my head to twist the truth, making myself mad or upset or jealous when I shouldn't be.
For example:
I hear: I'm going on a super fancy vacation, but you're not.
Reality: They're sharing a beach house with 10 people in Myrtle Beach and will be cooking dinner every night. There's sand involved. I wouldn't want to be on that vacation. I'm just jealous of the fact that I am at work and they are not. I have my own, Gail approved, vacation coming up soon.
I hear: I make more money than you do.
Reality: I chose my profession, knowing it wasn't going to be the most well-paid. I chose my department because I enjoy my work, more than I would enjoy theirs. I am not eligible for their bonus structure. I have my own bonus structure. I make enough money to live the life I want to live. And I busted my butt and reached my goals to get my July bonus.
I hear: I have a hot and sexy boyfriend, and you don't.
Reality: I closed that door years ago when Puff and I got married. Yes, I will fully admit to still occasionally wanting a super hot guy to check me out, but I'm not looking to replace Puff. I have a hot and sexy husband, who treats me well, takes care of me and Bimmer, and is there for me every day. I don't want to ever have to try to date again.
I wish there was a switch I could just flip whenever I have one of those jealous moments. My own personal therapy for it is to sometimes blog (in my personal blog) about how much is going right and awesome in my world. It's not meant to come off as bragging (although it maybe does) but it's just my way to right the train before it derails.
So go on and enjoy your beach house with your sexy boyfriend.
I'm going to watch "Wipeout" with Bimmer and let Puff throw hot dog buns at her. That's how we roll.
Who's jealous now?

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